Sunday, May 11, 2008

Likeability and Leadership


People don't follow people they don't like.


It amazes me how people miss this truism. Truism? Yeah, a truism... click here.


I coined that opening phrase after observing lots of leaders who just didn't seem to get it.



So let's get this point straight, once and for all-- explaining the truth in both negative and positive-statement forms:


  • People don't follow people they don't like

  • People generally follow people they do like

The answer isn't the Mr. Nice Guy Dale Carnegie Solution: to ditch your convictions and to become a spineless wimp who believes nothing, has no opinions, and who only wants acceptance. You know, the Chamber of Commerce Guy.


But being a person of conviction doesn't mean you need to earn a (D.D.) Doctorate of Disagreeability to "PROVE" just how much conviction you really have. Lots of leaders are so interested in COMPETENCE and IQ that they have no CHEMISTRY and EQ (emotional quotient). Good social skills are woefully lacking in many a leader and interpersonal interactions are half of our jobs as leaders.


I regularly work to evaluate my own likeability. Sure, people misread you and I sometimes-- but that's life. We can't lose sleep over those who might assign false motives to us or have some kind of an axe to grind. But we can work to make the most of every opportunity to be our best selves because that's the one that influences others.